Thursday Thirteen

I’ve only recently heard about this phenomena through the other blog I participate in, The Otherworld Diner so I decided to give it a shot on my own.

Thirteen ways to go mildly insane (I know, because I made this trip years ago)

1) Having an old dog that does new tricks: Dutch is a German short-haired pointer that I rescued about 10 years ago. Throughout the years Dutch has been a companion, an annoyance and comic relief. Now, at 12, Dutch has learned a new trick; climbing up on my furniture and . . . well . . . who needs to get up and run outside to go to the bathroom? Every night I have to put dining room chairs, guitars and empty hampers on every piece of furniture he can climb on just so I don’t have to shampoo my furniture the next morning.

2) Having one of your kids go on vacation: I know, most mothers say I’m insane, but I can’t help it. I love my kids and I miss them terribly when they’re not here.

3) Having the aforementioned child come home from vacation: Within moments after the hugs, the kisses and the “I’m so glad you’re home’s!” the other kids remember that they have unfinished arguing to do and the make it all up in the first 24 hours.

4)Having a husband who thinks everything can and should be made into a joke: And worse yet, they’re the same old tired jokes that I’ve heard over the last 20 years! I swear if I say “tongs” and he says “you’re welcome” one more time….!!!!

5) You have a child who acts just like his dad: Need I say more?

6) Your worrisome father-in-law lives in your basement apartment: Let’s just say, he doesn’t call or knock first before he comes up 🙂

7)Having a nineteen-year-old who thinks it’s funny to moon people: I have my brother, Hugh, to thank for that.

8) Having a five-year-old who thinks his brother mooning people is funny and isn’t afraid to show it: I just can’t wait for kindergarten to start! Oh, joy.

9)The circle game: Do any of you know what this is? If you don’t, allow me to explain. Basically you make a circle with your index finger and thumb, hold it below your chest and then try to get people to look at it. But the other people, knowing that you play this insipid game, are too clever to look at you outright, so you need to learn new and clever ways to catch them. i.e. taking a picture of your finger-circle and sending it to your victim as a text message. Yes, that’s right. And you’ll never guess who plays it all the !@#$ time!

10)You no longer color your hair ‘to be different’: I remember when I colored my hair just for a change. Now, if I don’t color my hair, people think I’m my husband’s mother. I’m 40, she’s 79! And yet, when I color my hair, people say I barely look like I’m out of my 20’s….go figure.

11) Having a younger brother who thinks it’s funny to rub his thumbs over the lenses of your glasses: Yes, Heath, I’m talking about you. And people wonder why I wear contacts.

12) Having a child who’s a vidiot (video-idiot): It’s so delightful when you ask your video game crazed child a question and the answer always, somehow, refers back to Nintendo.

13) Your Italian greyhound, Santa’s Little Helper, (yes, that’s his name) thinks the only place to lay down in your house is on you: We rescued Santa’s Little Helper about 2 years ago. My sister-in-law works for a pet shop and they couldn’t sell him because he has a deformed front right leg. He’s a loving dog, but no matter what I do, whenever I sit down to write, or read, or watch T.V. Santa feels the need to be right up under my chin. Ever try to type on a laptop with a dog’s torso resting on your chest? It’s not easy. He’s a weird dog anyway, but that’s for another time.

Well, I hope you enjoy this post as much as I enjoyed writing it. A special thanks to DD Mills for the fine example of Thursday Thirteen she has posted on her blog. Now back to work on my new WIP (work in progress)

This entry was posted in humor, maggie, Thursday Thirteen. Bookmark the permalink.

4 Responses to Thursday Thirteen

  1. DD says:

    Thanks for the credit! I can so relate to #12 – If I didn’t drag my 13yr out of his room – I’d never seen him – damn Xbox.


  2. Hee! After reading all of those, I now wonder at you only being “mildly” insane. ;?) I only have two kids, and they drive me bananas — and I’m an only child, so no brothers to bother me! :?) BTW, my daughter started kindergarten three weeks ago (she’s my youngest), and I am *loving* it. :?)


  3. Brenda ND says:

    Great Thursday Thirteen! I can see how these things might make you a little crazy.


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